Can a man disconnect from his need for human connection if he had a neglectful mother?

Unsurprisingly, human beings need human connection to be at their best. This is something that will have an effect on someone’s mental, emotional, and physical health.

The reason it’s not a surprise is that human beings are interdependent; they are not independent. This, however, can be difficult for many people to accept if they live in a society that creates the impression that people are their own island and do not need anyone.

Endurance

What plays a role in this is technological advances that make it much easier for someone to fool themselves into believing this. But since needing others is part of the human experience, if someone goes against his nature, he is likely to suffer in one way or another.

Now, what might be normal for a man is to live a life where he acts like he doesn’t need anyone else. This may mean that he may or may not have close friends, but it is unlikely that he has or wants a relationship.

The lonely man

In general, you may prefer to spend time alone and only spend time with others on rare occasions. As a result of this, he may spend most of his time living on top, engaged in intellectual or at least mental activities.

If he spends time with another or others, it could be because they have become close to him. He may rarely get close to others, and this is usually something that never crosses his mind.

There is no interest

If you were asked why you don’t spend more time with others, you might say that you just aren’t attracted to them. You could say that you don’t have a strong need to be around others.

If you were asked if you would like to be in an imitation relationship, you might say that you are not interested in that either. I could tell that she is fine the way she is and enjoys her own company.

another need

Still, this does not mean that you will not have sexual needs that you would like to satisfy; then again, he could rarely be interested in this. When you are, you could mainly look for material online to help you with this need.

Also, you may have times when you will engage in casual encounters. However, if your awareness is primarily in your head and not in your body, you will hopefully not have a strong connection to this part of your body and will end up overlooking these needs.

Inside world

When it comes to how you experience life, you can generally feel flat and not have a lot of energy. This may show that you will be spending a lot of time in your parasympathetic nervous system.

Since it has a tendency to feel flat on the inside, this will mean that it will look flat on the inside as well. He could be described as someone who is not very emotional or even fully alive.

infighting

So if you were to seek support, it is not because you feel overwhelmed and need to experience self-control. No, it will be because he feels flat, even dead, and doesn’t have much energy.

You could say that you often feel depressed and do not feel a strong desire to live. He could believe that life is meaningless and that he has no reason to live, and he was happy to end the day.

What’s going on?

At this point, it may seem strange why a man would be like this; he is, after all, an interdependent human being. It may seem that he was simply born this way and therefore will always be this way.

However, what happened during his formative years could be a big part of why he is the way he is. At this stage in his life, his mother may have rarely been available, and even when she was, she may not have been attuned to her needs.

brutal time

Then he would have expressed his needs by crying, moving, and stretching out his hands, but it would not have been very effective. After a while, after learning that his needs would not be met, he would have simply disconnected from his needs and entered a collapsed, closed state.

Having needs would have been too painful (he would often have felt rejected, abandoned, helpless, and hopeless, and he was) and the only way to deal with this pain was to shut down. Of course, she couldn’t ask for what he needed or find a caregiver who could actually be there for him; he simply had to adjust to a cold and loveless environment.

a divided being

When he was given attention, and there must have been times when he was or wouldn’t be alive, he was probably totally out of step with what he needed. The result of this is that he would probably have felt suffocated, trapped and agitated by the attention he received.

Due to the lack of proper attention, he would probably have connected with himself after being born whole, but would soon have ended up disconnecting from his body. Not only would this have caused her to lose touch with his emotional needs, but it would also have caused her to remain in a state of developmental delay, frozen and unable to assume life.

It has not finished

This stage of his life is now in the past, but a large part of his being has not really moved from what happened. She had to shut down and freeze to handle what was going on and it will continue to be.

Most, if not all, of the pain you experienced back then will still be held deep within your body. In order to reconnect with his need for human connection and become a more integrated and emotionally developed human being, he must overcome this pain.

Awareness

If a man can relate to this and is ready to turn his life around, he may need to seek outside support. This is something that can be done with the help of a therapist or healer.

Without this understanding, it would be easy to say that you have a personality disorder; actually, he has a personality adaptation. He suffered a lot from very early on and while his adult form will make him suffer, it kept him alive from very early on.