6 keys for a long-distance relationship to work

Long distance relationships can be difficult and often don’t work out. However, sometimes they do. Usually this is after you’ve spent a few nights or days together totally immersed in each other and a real and lasting connection has been established. It is much more than just a superficial level attraction.

It’s not uncommon in today’s times to hear a story where people somehow ended up together, despite being on the other side of the country (or world).

So how did they do it? How do they make it work? I will happily share.

1. You have to accept that long distance relationships are hard. Plain and simple. There is no real way around it. There is an obvious distance between you, emotions and jealousy can get in the way and you will wonder what you are doing. Then there’s all the physical frustration too. And you can make it work. See more about some things you can do to give yourself a real shot at success.

2. Make a commitment. (This one takes guts.) But you never know if it will work unless you actually do it. Once you’ve accepted that it’s going to be hard, you can mentally prepare for it and then work from there. Once you’re both ‘in’, you’ll take it more seriously.

3. Have an understanding. (Sometimes it is not spoken. Sometimes it is only understood). If you want to avoid unnecessary jealousy, worry, and frustration, accept how it will be. Do we see other people or do we not see other people? Are we open for appointments? Are we trying to make this work? Or just seeing where it goes? Whatever it is, it’s better to be on the same page.

4. Communicate frequently. It doesn’t matter if you have an agreed time or schedule to talk weekly or monthly. (that would be very helpful) Or a mental plan of when and how often you speak, all that matters is that you speak. And use other shapes to keep it interesting. Email, text, phone, skype, chat, video (see the bottom of this post for a freebie).

5. Save your money. Yeah I know, you’re like “What?” But yes, this is important. Whether it’s long-distance charges (obviously, avoid that with free Skype), gas money, bus tickets, car rental fees, or trips and excursions, you don’t want anything like money bogging you down getting anywhere near the person who cares about. And you also don’t want debt to stop you from making this great connection last. You probably also want to be together in person, that can mean flights, hotels, etc. Plus, random fun excursions will really make your experiences exciting!

6. Keep the fire burning! A large part of the work of love and relationships is about the attraction between you. If you want him to be successful, you want to make sure he gets his fair share of HOT! With so many fish in the sea and other people closer to you than your partner, you have to keep them in mind! And vice versa! Send cards, make videos, compliment them, tell them what you like/love about them, do your thing, talk dirty, show body parts and I’ll let you come up with the rest. (I have something that helps with this in a BIG WAY here.)

Sounds like a lot of work? It is not! You are doing these things anyway in a regular dating relationship! And if you really want it to work, you will make it work!

My friend is in London, UK. He met a girl when he was here in Toronto and they still keep in touch. They are in contact often. They talk about life, travel, each other’s experiences, still ask questions, chat and make videos. (A great tip at the end of this post, check it out!) She’s coming to London to visit in a few weeks!

I have another friend who put someone online, started tweeting, then chatting on Facebook, then skyping, then falling in love. He went to Australia and met her where she lived. I stayed with her for 3 weeks, had an amazing time with her, and came back to Toronto. They continued to Skype and talk regularly. Now several months later and she is here in Toronto! She goes to school here and they live together, very much in love.

It is very possible people! Do not give up!

Here’s a little video I made around Valentine’s to share an idea, that totally applies here, so I have to share it! It would work the same way for a long distance relationship! Totally relevant! Use it!

Why does this idea work so well? A lot is transferred through video. Emotions, tones, feelings, vibes and body language, not just words! That’s why the internet is obviously heading towards all of the video! Your mind actually reads a lot more than just the words you’re saying!

Bottom line, (I haven’t started a sentence like that since college) if you’re committed to it and really put in the effort to make it work, magical things can happen. And the universe will help you too! You are not alone in this.

It stinks a bit, I know. But if you really want it to work, there’s more to it than meets the eye.

Greetings and good luck to you! Here’s that link again to one of the biggest and best support tools I’ve ever created.